You want a man who loves you, who takes you seriously, who respects you, who treats you well, who offers you his own, who gives you an exclusive place.
If he perceives you as valuable, he will try all this with you, but if not, he will not invest in you.
If he does not perceive you as valuable, either because he did not see it, or because you did not intend to show it, he will no longer call, will no longer answer the next message, will no longer invest in quality time.
I do not justify that any lout is, nothing justifies that, no woman deserves it, but, ask yourself:
Is it possible that the idea you have of yourself and how to attract guys
, makes your experiences with them more bad than good, I think so.
Hypothetically… what would happen if you believed that you were worth and attracted only by your intelligence, and you wanted to attract a lot?
You would look for ways to develop, enhance and project that intelligence to the fullest in order to excel at it, right?
Well… The same thing happens when you think you are worth and attracted only by your physique, you seek to develop, enhance and project that physique to excel.
It is very intelligent to invest in your physique, there is no intelligent reason to neglect it, but you are not worth and attracted only by your physique, you are not only your physique.
And I know you agree with me, I have not said anything transcendent. You know, in theory, that you are much more than your physique, you are complex, interesting, you are substance, not a simple beautiful collectible object, but, then…
Why do some women feel jealousy, insecurity or envy when they don’t have the buttocks and breasts that others do?
Why do some women feel anguish when their new photo does not have as many likes as the previous ones, as if they were getting ugly, and why sometimes their self-esteem depends on that?
Why do some women prefer to dedicate 95% to projecting an attractive, pretty, sensual physique, and 5% to projecting their quality as people and how interesting they are?
Why does a good or bad day for some women depend on how beautiful and confident they felt in front of the mirror in the morning?
Why do some women feel brutally insecure about men disappearing after sex, is it because that’s the way men are, is it because they think they don’t have anything else to look forward to?
You’re not even worth it just because of your looks, but then why would an intelligent, interesting woman allow any of these common behaviors to prove that she believes otherwise?
Not only must you believe that you are so much more than your physique, not only must you agree and say so, you must be congruent. Not because you have to prove anything to anyone, for you.
Your self-esteem should not depend on your beauty, much less fluctuate because you are radiant or haggard.
Your greatest sense of security and power should not be because you feel or don’t feel the sexiest or prettiest in the place, because when you don’t feel that way, you will feel defeated.
It is important to look and feel beautiful, yes it is, but why not let your intelligence and your human quality radiate your true beauty?
As a man, I will tell you, you must not believe that guys only care about the physical, and that we do not look at anything else.
Those who are desperate or needy do. Those who don’t feel worthy enough to expect the same from a woman do. Those who have not seen in that specific woman something more attractive than her physique because perhaps she has not shown it, yes, too.
But if the man is like the one you want, of high worth, he, like you, has options, and if you prefer only the most attractive guys, depending on what you are attracted to from a man, he also prefers only the most attractive women, not just physically.
As a man, sometimes you can go out on a date with no other plan than to have fun and enjoy yourself, but something happens, something you see in her.
Something else that you didn’t expect and that makes you give it an importance that you didn’t expect, take it more seriously, interest yourself even more, want to know more about it, want to invest time and attention in it.
When you see a passionate sportswoman. When you see her sensitive, pleasant and kind to others. When she has values and you can see them. When she respects her parents and other women. When she doesn’t hate or dump her ex.
When she is responsible, dedicated and passionate about work and projects. When her talk is as attractive and interesting as her looks.
When she has the wit to annoy you and make you laugh. When she is the one who has the initiative.
When she knows she is valuable because of who she is, and not only because of her physique, but in balance with her physique.
Every important relationship I have had in my life, without exception, has been beautiful, unforgettable, I am lucky to have lived it, and it was not my plan to have that relationship, but she surprised me …
Be that woman who surprises, but don’t do it for the guys, do it because you are that woman who surprises.
Don’t confuse the effervescence of men wanting you when you look sexy or when you post sexy pictures, with valuable men interested in you as a person, because most of them are not and are not.
Don’t be the kind of woman who attracts the kind of suitors she doesn’t want. Be the kind of woman who attracts the kind of suitors she does want.
Look at yourself and decide that you will be whole, that your appearance will not be your everything but one more quality, that your physique will not be the most valuable and attractive thing about you but something else.
Decide to value yourself for your effort, work, talent, charisma, for your sense of humor, for your attitude towards life, towards men and towards other women.
Decide that your worth and your security will be your physique… and your personality, your confidence, your intelligence, your life dynamics, your self-realization, among others, and assume the responsibility and work that this means.
This will make you perceive yourself as a woman of high value, integrity, firmness, irreplaceability, and you will no longer feel fragile or vulnerable as you did when in practice, your self-esteem depended on your physique.
Being worth your physique is a shortcut, but it is also a trap and a comfort zone.
Get out of there, because out of there you will find where the pride in who you are is, where your values and qualities are most important.
Where what you really look for in a man, where your dignity, what treatment you deserve, and also, what treatment you do not deserve, what shit you do not tolerate, what kind of men you would never allow in your life.
Outside that comfort zone is where you’ll learn to be so smart that no one will ever get too smart.
Everything you want in you, inside and out, from a woman of high value, security, stability, elegance, sensuality, attitude, character, independence, self-sufficiency, being a bitch, in a good way… Well, they won’t just appear. Conquer them, just as you want guys to conquer you. Giddyup!